I witnessed a great example of Instant Karma on Friday. A bunch of us had gone to "old town" Burbank to get some lunch. This area is a couple of blocks of shops along San Fernando Road that is very narrow to encourage strolling around. There is angled parking on either side of the street, and spaces are coveted. The alternative is the parking structures, but that ends up taking up more minutes of the precious lunch hour.

Gil is trying to back out the car for us to leave. Usually, this doesn't take any time at all, because someone is always jockeying for a spot. The woman in the BMW approaching us was having none of it. We were NOT going to back out in front of her! So she sped up to close the gap. She then smashed into the BMW in front of her. That car stops, and an older, fussy looking woman emerges. The kind of lady for whom "that's why they call them bumpers!" and a smile is not going to be acceptable. This little fender bender then cock-blocked the traffic enough for Gil to edge out his little Honda, and for us to go on our merry way.

Had she just let us out, even if she didn't want our parking spot, how different would her day have been?

We saw the documentary The Aristocrats today. I haven't laughed that hard at a movie in a really long time. (Team America perhaps?) If you like comedy, it is a great lesson in breaking down a joke and timing. The joke itself is a great example of "The Turn," which is a comedy concept the Tiny Bandeleros have been working on lately.

Some of my favorites were Whoopie Goldberg, Paul Reisner and Billy the Mime. And the guy with the ventriloquist dummy. And Sarah Silverman. And the South Park kids. And of course, Gilbert Gottfreid, who inspired the whole damn movie by telling the joke at a Friar's Roast a few weeks after 9/11.

I got a funny compliment the other day, about how great my last show was. "It must have had to do with getting hitched!" they winked.

What it really had to do with was actually getting enough sleep, and not working at a day job right up until show time. (I took the last month or so off) Amazing how right on one's performance can be when all one has to do is perform. San Francisco was great as well for the same reason. Sleep until 11am, then hang out in a fun city and do a show at night. I know, that all the training goes into being able to give a good performance no matter what the conditions. Don't bring the crap of the day on stage, blah blah blah. But those days when I'm not Working For The Man are the best.

In other comedy stylings...Angela Hanigan and I are getting our two-woman show "Two Non Blondes" back on it's feet after a long hiatus. We've been working on new sketches and hope to have the full show up in January, and showcasing individual sketches during the fall. If you need five minutes filled, let me know!

If you'd like to see more photos of our wedding, Here you go.

Or here.

More Wedding Pictures...

Okay, I had problems upload pictures, and Steve just hasn't done it yet. But our good pal, Tom Misuraca of Kid Goth did. While you are there, also check out his photo spread from the recent Comicon in San Diego. He laid it out like a comic book and it is really cool. My fave pic is of Storm Trooper Elvis.

On to other things...

I saw another Armada the other day, and it was big and ugly. Then when it went by me, and I was seeing it from behind, I realized it is all just a false front and sides, like some old west town building or a Potemkin Village.* The profile of the back of the vehicle looks almost normal and proportionate. Big, but not bloated and dumbass. Then I saw another large Nissan. A Titan pick-up truck. And it was big, bloated and dumb ass looking as well! I realized I just hate all of the Nissan designs. But this goes against everything I know about Japanese design! I'm usually a super sucker for any and all of it. They are on the forefront- clean lines, and rounded edges. Form and function, together at last. Then why this? Are these vehicle actually being designed here in Detroit? Are they just making them look like Transformers because that's what American Men want to buy and they want to sell trucks in America, not educate and refine our sense of style. Leave that to the Germans, who don't sell a lot of trucks in the US.

Our Tiny Bandeleros show last night was another home run. We have one more show of the run left, this upcoming Friday night at ACME. Some of the Tiny Fandeleros are even going to come to Austin with us. That's really cool!!!

(*go ahead and correct me on that- back in the day in the Old Russia, they would creat false building fronts to impress the dignitaries rriding through. They were literally just scenery.)

I watched a little of that Bridezilla show last night on We or Oxygen or whatever chick cable network it airs on. It was such the opposite of our experience, it makes me wonder if we even got married. We were not nervous, too keyed up, or having hissy fits. Especially not on The Day. We did things a little non-traditionally, and it made all the difference.

1. informal wedding, outside. No ties, wear your good flip flops.

2. We stayed in the same hotel room the night before, and were able to wake up, look at each other, and say "We're getting married today!" like it was Christmas morning or something.

3. We saw each other before the ceremony. There was still the "moment" when we first saw each other, but it was a more random, private moment, instead of a huge, staged for the crowd presentation.

4. Marty Barrett as "The Preacher." His combo of serious and humorous, plus his ability to hold a crowd, kept the whole thing moving and light. Many guests complimented us, saying it had been the best ceremony they had ever seen. Usually that is the formality one suffers through as the guest to get to the party, so we know we made the right choice.

There had been some family reservations voiced about our decision to have a friend do the ceremony. I think of everything, that was the issue that was caused the most trepidation leading up. "Are you sure about this? You know getting married is a very serious thing. it's not for joking around." Of course, no one had seen the Day of the Dead Cake Toppers yet. That turned out to be the most disturbing issue on the actual day.

5. Day of the Dead Cake Toppers. I guess skeletons on the top of a wedding cake might seem a bit unusual if you are not familiar with all the Bride and Groom Day of the Dead art. And maybe if you are. Steve also wanted plasic dinosaurs, but we didn't find them in time.

6. We're Kinda Old. Why freak out now?

7. Jug Band.

We had a good day, the kind of day we both wanted, even if it wasn't what most people would do.

I wrote a very long, lovely post about the wedding this morning. It was just about finished, when the power went out. Steve has just spent the last three hours getting the voodoo that makes internet come into the house realigned. Unfortunately, he had to sacrifice Schmedly on an altar of empty Crate and Barrel boxes, but the information on how to reconfigure the router was right there in his entrails all along!

Here's what I wrote in a nutshell...

The wedding was awesome.

Highlights included Michelle's cake, the jug band playing Led Zepplin's "Whole Lotta Love" on kazoos including the guitar solo and Marty's ceremony. Getting married by a good friend who happens to be a professional actor, comedian and armchair philosopher is really the way to go.

Practically everyone there pitched in and helped make it happen, from my sis' husband Scott's amazing job on flowers and Charla's project managing to half the guests helping to clean up the park after it was all over. It was a beautiful, fun day.

Pictures will be posted as we get 'em!

For those of you keeping track at home, I finished the dress Tuesday night, to my great relief. I will not be sewing hooks on the night before.

Excuse the plug, but I want to let everyone know that the Tiny Bandeleros run at ACME Theater is coming to a close at the end of the month. We are actively looking for a new comedy home in Hollywood. We will do pick up shows around town, but if you want to catch them in the very lovely ACME, you have every Friday in July until July 31st. (Of course, I won't be there on July 8th, because I will be picking up my rolling pin, curlers and housecoat to begin my new life as Mrs. Stephen Johnson. Steve's electronic anklet will be installed that evening as well.)

We have had some line up changes over the past few months, and we have distilled ourselves down to a crack comedy team. Our shows since coming back from the San Francisco Improv Fest have been dynamite, each week even better than the last. Last night's show was one of those shows that you hope and dream about happening. You relish it as you are performing it, and remember and strive for that level of quality always. Every show can't be a 10, but you so want it to be. We had a small but enthusiastic crowd, made up of repeat strangers (building the fan base!) friends who brought friends and comedy guru, Gary Austin.

Tiny Bandeleros heads to the Out of Bounds Improv Festival in Austin in September. My good friend and soon to be Former Deputy Mayor of Santa Barbara, Marty Barrett, will be appearing as well.

Yesterday Steve and I ventured out to Santa Monica to meet up with our good friend Michelle Gardner. When she is not playing "God" on Joan of Arcadia or getting rave reviews in LA Women's Shakes "Merchant of Venice", she is the manager of a Starbucks at 26th and Wilshire. It is a lovely store in a bustling neighborhood.

As we were crossing the street to go in we saw the ugliest SUV ever. It took our breath away, and then made us laugh. It was a Nissan Armada. On so many levels, hilarious. Besides a very ugly, giant grill, it is actually called ARMADA. Like big fleet of ships. I'm guessing the driver wouldn't be caught dead in a giant late model Buick station wagon, or in a brand of pants called Wide Load Ass, but yet, they will willing drive a vehicle called Armada. and it was big ass. We actually looked around for hidden cameras. It was a total Simpsons "Canyonaro."

I just built a link to the Armada, and I see that the grill is not the same. Maybe the owners customized their Armada. They made it even uglier.

I don't know when I became a grill snob. Steve really likes the Scion XB, and would like that to be our next car. I like them as well, the boxy shape like an old timey milk truck appeals, but I can't get over the ugly ass grill. I don't know what I would change exactly, but I should take a look at the grills I have like over the years and compare. Too bad I am not taking a design class right now, it would make a great project.

Realistically, though, I have no interest in engaging in projects like that anymore unless I get paid to do it. Isn't that sad? It serves me nothing. I already know I hate the ugly grills, there is no way my input will change them, so why bother? To be able to support my argument at a cocktail party? With who? The only person that might actually have a serious conversation about this topic is Vinh, and I bet he agrees with me.

WARNING! This post contains girly stuff, that if you don't want to hear about it, move on!

So we are in the last week before the big day. My friend Rebecca is finishing up with beauty school, and offered to do my hair for the wedding. I will be her model in September when she takes her Boards. I went down to her school yesterday, for a little practice session. The girl who has the chair next to her is Indian, and is Threading a woman's eyebrows. I ask if she could do my upper lip. I have never had threading done before, and it is supposed to be very good. Jen had done the peach fuzz on Rebecca's face a few months ago, and it looked great. Subtle and smooth. Jen just leans me back, and starts. No time to think about it.

Oh my god. The excruciating pain.

The twisting thread rips the hair from your skin. Not like wax, which sort of gets it all at once, and fast, but slower somehow. It's ripping it out in a wave, so the pain travels across, and lasts. She went very fast, but not fast enough. If I weren't so vain, I would have stopped at half. But the thought of fuzz on one side only was enough to soldier forward. It looks great, suble and smooth, but it is still a little tingly the next day.

Today is a big sewing day-huppah, ring pillow, and hopefully finishing the dress! I have to move the zipper from a very fashionable side seam, under the arm to a CB. I will never be able to get the dress over my head with hair and makeup done, and I don't want to sit around in the dress for three hours, getting it all wrinkly. What could I spill on a white dress in three hours?