Dexter called the police Friday.

I don't like to let him play with the phone, which means it is the most desirable thing in the world to him. He loves to clutch it in his chubby hands and push the beeping buttons. Here is some proof:

So on Friday, against my better judgement, I let him hold the phone. He was sitting on my lap while I was writing an email, and trying to bang on the keyboard (more buttons that beep.) If I just keep hanging up the phone after three or four beeps, he can never call Zimbabwe, right? Quickly finished email, extracted phone and we went about our merry way.

About twenty minutes later, we are quietly hanging on the couch while Dex has his 5pm bottle. BANG BANG on the door. I thought it was UPS, the afternoon guy tends to just bang on the door. I swing it open, and there are three of LA Finest.

"Uh...can I help you?"

"You called 911?"

I was absolutely mortified. Dexter was delighted to see new people, and cooed and smiled in my arms.

"I let the baby play with the phone. Oh my God. I'm not going to get a ticket or a fine or something?"

"No ma'am. Are you sure everything is okay?"

They then proceeded to ask about Steve and his whereabouts, and the neighbors (we live in a duplex) but didn't actually ask to search the premises, which I found out later is usually the standard procedure in case someone is hiding out of sight and putting me up to talking to police. I must have been pretty convincing, as they just went away after that.

I should find it funny, but I'm embarrassed to have wasted taxpayer money on a false alarm. Steve said most of their day ends up being stuff like this. I guess a cushy false alarm at the end of the day is not the worst thing that happened to those cops on Friday. Steve saw them hanging out chatting down at the corner when he came home 15 minutes later, so they weren't in that big of a hurry.

Dexter is no longer allowed to play with any phones.

OMG. Enough with the garbage already!

Turns out, we have been paying for the garbage for both units. Ben and Helen used to live in our unit for a few years while they were finishing building the other side of the duplex where they live now, so the garbage is on the bill for this unit. We got another letter from the city this week reminding us that we have extra cans and were going to have to start coughing up an extra $5/month for the privilege soon unless we called to have them removed.

It reminded me that I had talked with Helen when we moved in about the DWP bill, back when the garbage was $7/month. It was going to be too big of a hassle to get the bill switched next door, so we agreed to just keep it on ours. We have a great deal on the rent and it seemed like not a bad trade off.

She and I are playing phone tag, but I'm sure we will get it resolved. A relief.

To answer some comments...

We pay the DWP bill bi-monthly, but if it was quarterly, we'd be paying a whopping $108.96 after the proposed increase. The garbage is billed to all homes and apartments with city cans, both owned and rented homes, condos and apartments. Most condos and larger apartment complexes have private dumpsters. A lot of houses here have rental properties in the back, and 2,3 or 4 unit apartments are very common.

The ACME show is SUPPOSED to be available online, but I'm not sure if it is yet. I can find out. It should be archived at the very least, but they are trying to stream them live as well for a modest fee. I think you can watch the previously recorded shows at www.acmecomedy.tv

Wore a "pre-pregnancy" dress this weekend. Another milestone reached.

I am becoming Obsessed with the Garbage Lady. We got a mailing from the city this weekend, announcing a hearing at the end of July, because they want to raise the garbage rates again. They are already scheduled to go up next fall, '09. from $26/month to $28. Which I'm already paying, so WTF? But now the city would like to not wait, but jack up the rate THIS September to $36.32. This is actually the highest rate, paid by single family dwellings and duplexes. Three units and over pay about ten dollars less. Most apartment buildings actually have private dumpster hauling and don't even deal with this. So 3 people living in a one bedroom apartment are paying the same amount as a 5 bedroom house.

The mailing does mention that this cost covers the full cost of refuse service in the city, all 447 square miles, including recycling, hazardous waste disposal and large object hauling. When you put it that way, it actually sounds like quite a deal. What I'd like to see is the budget breakdown, and where were they getting the money two years ago to run this whole operation if the cost has gone from $7 to $36. Local taxes? Was garbage completely cut out of the local budget so now it needs to support itself entirely? Am I the only person in the city who thinks this is a little extreme? I feel like a crank, but it's not a bill you can change or conserve. I can drive less, turn off the lights, and not talk on the phone, but I'm paying for that can whether I throw anything away or not. And our recycling is picked clean a couple times a day by guys pushing shopping carts collecting cans and bottles, so unless I fill it with cardboard the blue bin is never filled either.

Hey you kids! Get off my lawn!

Action Newsroom at ACME

In a new show, "Action Newsroom" at ACME, and it started this past Friday. Eliot really out did himself this time on the opening credit sequence, and Jonathan our regular piano player wrote the Action News theme. I smell a local newscast Emmy!!

It's been awhile...

I saw this today and I believe it may be a sign of the impending apocalypse. And not the part with the rapture and goodness, but the part with the Hell on Earth and pestilence and stuff.

Shield Your Eyes